The artful goodbye: How to say farewell to your child before camp

Tomorrow’s the big day. I know this because I got a calendar reminder today on my computer: “Boys arrive tomorrow.” Gee, thanks, I hadn’t noticed. While we here at CH HQ are getting ready to say hello to those boys, you are getting ready to say farewell. Here are some thoughts we have on saying good bye when you send your child to camp. Tomorrow.
1. Recognize that you will be as emotional, if not more, than your son. Being intuitive little creatures, they will pick up on your emotions. It’s important to be positive, even if you are feeling unsure and weepy. Crying or over-worry will undermine his confidence. Remind him that he *can do this*! Remind him you are just a letter away and that you love him and *believe* in him. Tell him you are excited for the experiences he’s going to have.
2. If you haven’t already discussed homesickness with him by now, go ahead and have that conversation. Tell him missing home is natural, and that you’d be sad if he didn’t miss you. Tell him to talk to his counselor if he’s feeling blue. Remind him that you aren’t going anywhere and you’ll be there at the end with open arms dying to hear all the, as one parent emailed me today said, “the usual amusing, heroic, enlightening, and eyebrow raising stories that the boys come home with.” (Remember we are well-versed in helping boys work through homesickness.) If you have any doubt, check out Michael Thompson’s book, Homesick and Happy. It’s GREAT. Also, I recently spoke with Michael Thompson on summer camp and these issues, and it’s available on podcast.
3. Keep it short and sweet. Make a plan ahead of time, so that there’s no surprise at 2:00 p.m. when you say, “OK buddy, we’re headed home.” If you’re taking the bus: Arrive at 9:15 – 9:30 a.m., check in with the counselor on duty at the bus, help your boy load his stuff on the bus. Make sure you’ve communicated any last minute instructions to the counselor and hang out until they move the boys on to the bus. Give him a big hug! Wave! Pat yourself on the back for keeping a stiff upper lip!
If you’re dropping him off at camp, tell him the plan. “First we’ll check in. Then we’ll make your bed. I’d like a tour of camp, and once we check in with the nurse, I’ll walk you back to your cabin and give you a hug from there.” Everyone likes to know what’s happening next (believe me, I have a two-year old, I know what I’m talking about). Knowing what comes next helps set him up for a confident start.
That’s it! Positive attitude, preparation and a plan. With those three things, that goodbye will be sweet and relatively painless.
We’ll Facebook it when the busses arrive and camp is fully underway. If your son is flying in, you’ll get a phone call from the counselor when they arrive.
See you tomorrow!
I ❤ CH // tracy b.